What's the PROBLEM: (1) Information Overload, (2) Negative Filtering, (3) Lack of Follow-up.
Trying to get out of something you've been battling for almost a decade, however to no avail as yet? You feel helpless at times, however you do feel Victorious at other times too. You ask yourself whether are you ever gonna win with FULL As or just "A,B,F,A,A". Here are some guidelines I could share. [Extracted from "Know Can Do. Put your know-how into action." by Ken Blanchard, Paul Meyer, Dick Ruhe]
Information Overload.
What does that mean? All along I know in the nutshell of who God is and that He love me because the Bible said so. I knew that from the Bible, from books, from people, etc. However, the main focus isn't head knowledge. The centre of KNOWING HIM is EXPERIENCING HIM. When was the last time you encountered Him? Was it 3years back, or when was it? It's only by getting closer to Him, listening to Him, following His directions, obeying Him, loving Him, reading His Word, encountering Him, receiving His vision, that can began to KNOW Him. Otherwise, all would be just textbook knowledge. Why can't head knowledge let us know Him?
We retain only a small fraction of what we read and hear only once. Therefore, we should read and learn less more and not more less. REPEAT THEM OVER TIME. It may seem silly to repeat this sentence every morning in front of your mirror, "I am fearfully and wonderfully made. In Him I have the Victory". However, if you really do so for 21weeks, you're really gonna become what you say! Therefore, speak LIFE and live LIFE. Once you've become what you speak, you'll be better able to make BIG THINGS HAPPEN!
Negative Filtering.
Here we've got a big stinking thinking to clear. People are often too negative, which gives them an inadequate filtering system. Let me ask you a question. Is positive thinking more powerful than negative thinking? I would certainly say so. Then is it a CHOICE to choose between positive thinking and negative thinking? Of course you do. Then why don't most people choose positive thinking over negative thinking? That's because we're often programmed that way. Let me show you how.
Right from the beginning, I think all of us are searching for unconditional love. We don't want to be loved conditionally, depending on what we do or say on any given day. We want to be loved for who we are. Unfortunately, all the people who are gathered around us (our parents and other adults) haven't necessarily gotten this kind of unconditional love themselves, which makes it hard for them to give it. This they tend to love us conditionally, based on our behavior. So we are constantly trying to do things to gain approval and a sense of belonging. NOW, you'd ask "How does this relate to negative thinking?"
As kids, we tried to get attention thru our achievements, seeking praise and approval from our parents. It was a frustrating process, bcoz, like all of us, our parents tended to accentuate the negative rather than the positive. When we behaved well, they expected it and therefore didn't say anything. When we did something wrong, they jumped all over us! I'm not saying it's wrong to correct kids when they're off course, BUT not without positive reinforcement too. When we don't get caught doing right, we start to doubt ourselves and doubt others. We begin setting up defense mechanisms (saying nothing will go right for me) to protect ourselves. We start filtering everything that comes to us thru a mind that is totally dominated by negative thinking. Our minds bcom CLOSED. We adopt judgemental attitudes and our insights are fear driven.
HOWEVER, no matter how bad our situations or backgrounds are, God will ALWAYS TURN them AROUND for us so in order that we FULFILL our DESTINY He has placed in each of us. Don't believe me. Listen to this. The author of this book was reprimanded in school for mispronouncing his words, and he didn't like school. However, can you belive that he is NOW an AUTHOR? What made him bcom one? His department chairman's belief in him, and had praised him for who he really is. God sends people around us to REMIND us of WHO WE ARE in HIM. Amen? I least expect anyone would comment on my smile, and thought that I don't look good and I'm not a person fitted to smile persay. However, Clare was the 1st person who complimented on my smile. However, that's not the end. I'm still working on it. Especially at times when the situations unable me to smile. Can you see what's happening?
First, one person who shows confidence in you can make all the difference in the world! Second, we have a choice about who we're going to listen to!! What you choose today, determines your tomorrow, yeah? However, I know we do make wrong choices at times, submit them all to God and He'll make your paths straight!! Believe it!! Otherwise, those who have gone onto the wrong path, could not come back onto the right one. Which isn't true! We've seen drug addicts, former robbers turning a new leaf! God is so great, and nothing can be against Him. He's the NAME above all NAMES. "Sin" is a name, and therefore, God is GREATER than sin! That's the concept.
Therefore, instead of saying "I can't write, I can't write, I can't write", try saying "I CAN write, I CAN write, I AM A WRITER!" For my case, I'll say, "I CAN SOLVE THE QUESTIONS. I AM AN ACCOUNTANT. I AM A FINANCIAL PLANNER"
Lack of Follow-Up.
Since some people, after they are exposed to something new (The TRUTH, Good Strategies for deliverance), don't have a follow-up plan, guess what happens? They REVERT BACK to OLD HABITS. People need a follow-up plan to put their know-how into action. What's follow-up then?
It's a review of how are you doing with the given knowledge/help now. It's to TELL ME, SHOW ME, LET ME, OBSERVE ME, PRAISE MY PROGRESS/REDIRECT ME. After saying so much, how to follow-up, you would ask. Follow-up is providing more structure, support and accountability. Structure and accountability can be provided when you plan to meet up your mentor once every 2 weeks, for 15-30minutes. However, most of us worry, of who can be our mentor to help us in the area where we need help. Who would be available for me to meet me once every 2 weeks? Find somebody who you can trust to give you support in prayer and in mentoring. I'm sure there would be many who would be willing to help. It need not necessarily need to be once every 2 weeks. It can be once a month, etc. During the follow-up, the mentor will then TELL YOU, SHOW YOU, LET YOU, OBSERVE YOU, PRAISE YOUR PROGRESS/REDIRECT YOU.
One-on-one meetings and outside telephone coaching are also helpful vehicles for closing the knowing-doing gap.
After hearing all of the above. What should you do? Start planning your follow-ups, and practice the steps mentioned above.